This one will give you goosebumps...

Last Saturday, Buzz left for work full of excitement. He was to have a first date with a special girl he has been interested in for a while. They were going to go to the 7:15p showing of the movie "Spirit" at the theater by our house.


But as the day progressed, a heavy layer of fog fell over our valley. I started to feel a true sense that something terrible was going to happen. I've gotten this weird sense of foreboding before, and have learned that I am rarely failed by listening to it. It's far different than just an over-protective parent worrying feel, but something that lingers deep in my bones.


I told KingBee, who has also learned to respect these premonitions(I am not fond of the connotations that go along with that word choice; but it is the best we've found to describe this). We checked the weather service, and they had indeed listed a fog advisory. This girl lives a half hour away on unfamiliar roads, and Buzz is a new driver. When he got home from work, we told him that we were sorry and needed him to reschedule the date for another time, but that safety was more important. He was disappointed, but understood. We didn't think much more about it.


Early Monday morning, I was watching the local news. The pictures that I saw gave me chills. Five boys were in a tragic car accident, on their way to the 7:15 showing of "Spirit" at the same theater, only a mile from the theater. The wrecked car was the same color and size as the one Buzz would have been driving. One boy was killed, and hte other four are in critical condition.


I still get chills every time I think about this close call. When they gave more information about the boys, I realized that Buzz knows them. They were all boy scout friends, from another troop that we have often done group activities with over the years. Buzz and the guys from his troop are pretty shaken up about it as well.


I am just filled with sorrow for these families and friends, and with somber gratitude that I was given the gift of premonition so that our boy wasn't there at that time.

Observations from A Toy Seller

I took on a part-time job working at a small toy store a few weeks before Thanksgiving. With all my other responsibilities, I needed my part-time work to be a little carefree, in a place with a positive vibe. I was certain that my first month would be the busiest time of the year.

I was surprised, however, to realize that without lots of added responsibility, I was able to fall into a happy old habit of observing. It must be the dormant anthropologist in me, but I have been having a jolly old time of it. I thought a few of my observations about toys, the economy, and relationships might make for a light hearted post.

There is little long term play value for the money in toys today.
Ours is a somewhat higher end toy store, yet I am appalled to see how much of the toys marketed today have a very limited purpose. The craft and science kits are designed in a once-and-done consumable fashion, most at a minimum of $20 a pop.
While we carry a large variety of great toys for imaginative play like puppet theaters, wooden blocks and kitchen food sets, etc. , they were not the big sellers that the consumable crap proved to be this year, even at similar prices. I understand the trend toward consumable toys from a manufacturer's perspective, but I was a little surprised that in this economy too few have adjusted their purchasing habits toward value.

We rely too heavily on the Chinese for manufacturing.
I know that we all *know* this, but I have been overwhelmingly shocked at the reality of it. I began noticing it as I faced the shelves (moving everything to the front of the row in neat lines). I have to say that the only items I found not made in China were a few wooden toy sets and figurines made in Germany, and specialized items manufactured in the States. Even the lovely wooden toy puzzles and block sets are traveling halfway across the world.

We have discussed this a great deal as a family, and are especially interested in the economic labor aspects of this trend. We are doing our best to be conscious of this in our own purchasing. I tried to set an example this year in my own gifts and purchases, selecting handmade mittens and a sweater coat from Nepal, a hand-thrown pottery tea mug, and silver jewelry and iron work made by local artisans sold at a local craft fair.

Something we have done, and encourage you all to do is get involved with the grassroots efforts to Help Save Handmade Toys. We all need these artisans to be able to use places like Etsy and the WWW to increase sales for us all.

There are many aspects to "Grandparent's Envy"
I had first heard the term used in reference to parent's of adult children who had chosen to put off marriage and family for career. I thought it was all about babies, and as one who much prefers children once they hit the rugrat stage, I just didn't get it at all.

This year, however, I have a new understanding of the many facets of this condition. I am certainly LONG away from wanting my children to have children of their own, so no warnings of "be careful what you wish for" are needed here. But this is the first year that neither of my children was in the market for toys. The closest I got was getting Honey a few small UglyDolls, which she thought were very funky.

I'm not really talking solely about toys to purchase, for said reasons above, but toys to make. DH and I had a great discussion about this over cocktails the other night, and it was neat to see his interest in the ideas as well. One of the great joys of being a parent for us was those projects of building our own train tables and play forts for the kids.

Even when we had no money for supplies, we found creative ways ot make things happen for them. I remember hand sewing puppets with scraps of outgrown clothing. I made a "fairy corner tent" out of a pair of thrift shop sheers, a few spools of ribbon and a hula-hoop when the catalog version was too pricey. I look at some of the great projects being made by others in Blogland with littles and grandlittles and long to try them as well. I realize how much I miss toymaking, and that it holds a joy much different than making clothing.

Hopefully some of my nieces and nephews will start having kids soon, so I can get crafting .

Well, I must get in the shower for another shift at the toy store!

Celebrating the Season...

I am utterly rested. What a glorious statement at this time of year. The gifts are all wrapped, the house is decorated, and all that is left is more baking today. Still, I have not felt rushed in any of it.

I've been having quite a bit of fun with the kids as well. Buzz was recently hired at the toy store where I work, as two of the teens gave their notices immediately after getting their Christmas bonus checks. He is doing quite well, I am told, though I did request that if at all possible we not work together ;) One skill he needed to learn quickly was how to wrap gifts, as it is a complimentary service we provide. We spent a fun afternoon together in lessons we termed "Gift Wrapping 101. "

HoneyGirl and I have fallen into a fun habit. On the nights that I work, I come home too wired for immediate sleep. Honey, a true night owl, is waiting for me with a selection of movies, a roaring fire, and a prepared snack. We've been up laughing past midnight all week. We both realized how much we needed to just have fun time together, not just running errands and homeschooling.

What a gift I have rediscovered in slowing down for a bit. I even discovered that I have enough peace to compromise a bit on the holidays. While I do not enjoy the tradition of Christmas Eve with my DH's dysfunctional family, he pointed out that it is the only tradition of the holidays that he has from his childhood. While admittedly screwed up, this is the only family he has really known.

At the same time, he respects the fact that it is really difficult for me because I have had lovely experiences in my childhood, yet my family is all but gone. We decided this year that we will go with fresh hope to the dinner, with the option of leaving early if trouble is afoot. In compromise, he agreed it is best to not extend open invitations for me to entertain his family on Christmas day, and instead we are spending a family day alone together. Maybe I will decide to take some time during all the relaxing to finally do my Christmas cards ;)

Stepping off the Treadmill

Thanks for all of your notes of concern over my allergic reaction. It is a pretty scary thing and I probably shouldn't have been so blase about it. I didn't mean to frighten any of you at all; I suppose it is years of living iwth incidents like this that I take them in stride. I have come to look at the cookie swap as both a blessing and yet another funny example of life imitating an episode of Seinfeld.


The blessing is that I was forced to step off the treadmill of my life this week. The physical reaction was pretty serious, and my body needed a few days to recover fully. Which meant crossing all the extras off the calendar, and just relaxing. We did no schoolwork beyond the algebra midterm; and I did no lesson planning, nor any co-op administration.

Instead, I sat an unwrapped ornaments, while Buzz and Honey decorated the tree. The kids cleared the pictures off the mantle to be replaced by stockings and candles. We did a lot of pleasure reading by the fire, and I slept in until at least 7am all week long. (huge for me...that's an extra three hours a day!)

We've all been a little giddy, in fact. The holiday spirit has indeed snuck into our home...we just needed to slow down enough to notice it. We all have been making plans with friends to do some special celebrating. Yesterday, I had a great day out with my girlfriend that deserves it's own post, with pics.

There is snow and sleet coming in today, so we will do some baking and wrap some gifts to place under the tree. I think I will even find hte time to get those holiday cards out-better late than never. Wishing you all some holiday joy!

Cookie Swap Horrors...

Cookie swaps sound like a great idea. A group of friends all decide to get together, each baking the mother lode of their favorite cookie, and then everyone gathers at one person's house to socialize over coffee and exchange adorable little packages, recipes, and taste test the goods.

I had tagged along to one in New Jersey with a friend a few years back, as a slot had opened up in their extra large one. I suppose that I was at another time in my life, as my memories were wonderful.

Some of my homeschooling friends decided to give it a try this year. I decided to make my newly discovered best cookie ever: Andes' Creme de Menthe cookies. Last year, I found the manufacturers sold those delicious thin mints as chopped bits for baking. I made four dozen for Christmas eve, and they were gone within an hour.

Determined to share this find, I signed up in October to make this unique cookie. As soon as the stores put out their holiday baking displays, I was searching for my bags of mint bits. I couldn't find them anywhere. It seems that this year, Andes' decided to make a different bit: white chocolate with candy cane bits. This would not do.

As the swap drew nearer, I recruited friends in searching for the bits at their grocery stores as well. My best friend called eagerly sharing that she didn't find the bits, but she did find a display with the recipe using the plain mints, and dropped off two boxes and the recipe. Adding the chopping of the mints really wasn't that big of a deal, right? Relieved, I bought eight more, and set my baking for last Friday morning.

I got started around 8am, figuring I would have enough time to get the 16 dozen batches finished before needing to get ready for the Christmas dance later that evening. I opened the first package and realized I had forgotten a simple fact in my time calculations: each mint is individually wrapped. Ten packages and an hour and a half later, all the mints were opened and chopped.

HoneyGirl came in, wanting to help with the baking. We quadrupled the recipe, and got it all mixed. I remembered mid way through that my MIL had my extra large mixing bowl, so we had to back track and divide the recipe in half into two large bowls before adding in the flour. It seems I wasn't done misjudging my time, as I had forgotten that the dough needs to chill for at least an hour before spooning to bake. I only managed to get eight batches baked and put away before I ran out of time. At least this dough chills well, and I popped it away to bake the remaining cookies later.

Once baked, I filled holiday chinese take-out style boxes with a dozen each. I printed out recipe cards, and tied them to the handles with curling ribbon bows. I decorated each package with a mini-Christmas ball, and filled my basket with my goods as we left for the host's home on Sunday afternoon.

The hosting family has a large family and extra large dining room that was ideal for such an event. Except that a week before, I discovered that they hvae numerous cats. Not a big deal, except to people with cat allergies. I made arrangments to make a quick exit and popped a Benadryl on the way there, but went hoping for the best.

We arrived and the holiday dishes were all laid out, and the cider was warming in the stove while the coffee brewed. Within fifteen minutes, my throat was tickling. A half hour in, I was wheezing. I did my inhaler and drank some strong coffee, and everything seemed to subside. I was having a lovely time visiting.

Once we began the taste testing, I asked each person if there were any nuts in their cookies. these are all friends who know of my allergy, and I told them to just let me know which cookies were for my family, and which I could eat as well. Some were so wonderful to make special batch just for me.

I returned home after being gone only two short hours, feeling a little wheezy but not bad. We watched football, and the fmaily began sampling the cookies. I nibbled on some "safe" cookies as well. After a bit though, I began feeling very ill. I went out to check the recipes, unable to figure out what I had ingested that was making me react so strongly. One of my dearest friends forgot that "almond extract" was actually from a nut, and I had eaten a half dozen of her little Swedish spritz cookies.

Needless to say, I spent SUnday night very ill, over-medicating and purging, to get the nuts out to my system. Luckily it was almond, my least reactive nut. I still was feeling the effects on Monday, as I did Honey's algebra mid-term review from bed, and napped all afternoon. I was able to manage working somehow last evening, but I kept having to sit down and had these flashes of the sweats. I woke today still feeling pretty sick, and decided that after her mid-term, we will just watch movies by the fire. I don't have the time to be this sick.

Of one thing I am certain....I am done with cookie swaps. Maybe this is God's way of mentally preparing me for my upcoming diet in the new year. I can't even look at a cookie now without cringing!

Our Christmas Dance

It was a Friday night in December, so everyone would expect all the homeschooled kids to be home reading physics books, right?

Someone forgot to tell our teens that this past weekend! A dear friend and homeschooled mom organized a wonderful Christmas dance especially for homeschoolers in our area. She rented a lovely reception hall for the 60+ kids that signed up this year.

Our gang surely didn't waste any time getting the party started, and the dance floor was full almost as soon as the DJ switched from background music as we arrived to top 40 hits. HoneyGirl is dancing with friends in the front row in the above pic by her long dark blonde hair and plum colored dress!

The dance floor looked like this all night...packed with teens having the time of their life. But it was very different from the ones I remember as a teenager. There were no "cool" guys leaning against the wall laughing at others. There were no couples sneaking outside doing things they shouldn't, and not one incident of under age drinking. The ownership and staff at the hall were gushing over the amazingly uncharacteristic behaviour of our kids...and invited us back for the spring prom with open arms.

The smiles and energy were amazing, and I felt so lucky to be one of the chosen few to chaperone (only six adults were there...as this was a party for the teens). The floor was packed until the end. I can't thank this mom enough for all she does planning these events for our homeschoolers.

Unexpected Gifts...

Last day of co-op before Christmas break is always a cheerful time. This year the spirit of joy was overwhelming. My Bah Humbug flew out the window in the midst of so many special hugs and handmade cards. A few of the teens had the idea to come dressed up like funky elves and reindeer, and handed out candy canes and chocolate to everyone at lunchtime.

The biggest surprise was how much giving was going on there. These families really chose to show their appreciation in a way I have never experienced before. There were lots of gifts being exchanged; some were precious and homemade, while others were thoughtful and unique.
The children, many who I've never had as students in my own classes, were coming to hug me with holiday wishes. The most adorable was one little second grader who told me that our co-op has made this "the best year of her entire life."

Can you imagine a better gift than that? I didn't think it was possible, but then I had forgotten what an amazingly thoughtful gift-giver my dear friend and partner in this venture always manages to be. She surprised me with the most precious gift: a large framed collage. She has a candid shot of me in the middle, with the quote "Education is the not the filling of a bucket, but the lighting of a fire." (Our motto). Underneath, she wrote "Thank you for being our spark. Surrounding this is a photo of almost every student and teacher who is a part of our group. I cried it is so beautiful!

You can only imagine then, that my spirits were quite high after a day so wonderful. These families had not only reminded me of the intrinsic value of all the work I do for co-op, but had actually found a way to share their contagious holiday joy. Both kids went off with friends after the day; one for a major biology study session and the other to just hang out and play a bit. I kicked off my shoes and sat down to read through the mail, and found that there was one more unexpected gift waiting for me.

Buzz Boy's PSAT scores were in the mail. I had been anxiously awaiting them after a call from the local high school's guidance counselor on Monday. The scores had been sent there , as he had taken them with the group there. The counselor had told me that Buzz had done "extremely, extremly well" and that he in fact scored second highest of anyone in their school that year. I was able to review each section and was thrilled with how well he had done. He did so well, falling just short of National Merit scholarship numbers. (Remember that the "second best" is relative to that school's population, not all students nationally) .

I was so thankful for the quiet house then, to sit and reflect on this homeschooling journey. Certainly, this test is not the end all proof that homeschooling has worked for my kids. I can look at them as such unique and capable young people and have pride on any day.

But what this test shows me is that success in the traditional popularly- recognized ways is readily possible as well. Buzz is certainly bright, but is by no means a self-motivated student. But his world was filled with quality literature and adults who have a passion and excitement about education, and it rubbed off. I'm not brilliant, but I am resourceful and admit my limitations. If I couldn't teach something well, I found someone else who could. We were able to find that nice balance when we hit the high school years between delight- driven studies and plowing through the harder, sometimes boring stuff for the mere learning of it.

I told Buzz that he was going to have to let me present him as "the poster child for success of normal homeschooled teens " on my blog, and he agreed with laughter. He likes that label a great deal. He is rightfully pleased with himself. He surprised me to mention that he wants to get an SAT study guide, hoping to increase his scores at least another hundred points. A friend had told him that the better the score, the better chance for scholarship money.

The best gifts are sometimes take a while to arrive, but boy are they worth the wait!!